The Healing Horse, Ch 7, Scene 09: Kitten Sees Pegasus in a Receding Tunnel

The story grows darker as little Karen faces the possibility that Pegasus may never again come alive for her. But don’t worry! She gets through it before the chapter ends.

Scene 09: Kitten Sees Pegasus in a Receding Tunnel

When Karen arrived at the hippodrome, she saw that it was fenced off. It was empty and noiseless. It was filled with a silence that the calliope had always kept hidden. The loudness of that silence deafened her, in contrast to the happy sounds of the Sunday crowd that surrounded her. The void and the emptiness overwhelmed her. She felt exposed and open to her darkest fears. Wounded in mind, body, and soul she had to sit down. She collapsed onto a nearby bench.

This is not the same, anymore. Something has to be done to save Pegasus and the other horses. I know they are only wooden, but Pegasus has a soul and is alive in his own way. I have to help them, somehow! I have to do something! I have to at least try!

Forcing herself to her feet, she squeezed through a gap in the fence and pushed against the hippodrome door. It did not move. She pulled the handle with all her strength, but it would not budge. Leaning against the window, she strained her eyes peering into the gloom within. There, in the distance, was Pegasus, carelessly tossed atop a pile of wooden horses.

She felt her sadness lift for a moment as she saw him, but then the scene seemed to change. The interior of the hippodrome became a mysterious tunnel. Shadows from the darkened area around him washed over Pegasus, almost burying him in a hazy, obscure half-light. Cognizant that her anxious imagination had taken over her perception, she watched as he and the others became smaller and smaller in the perspective of the tunnel.

Leaning her weak left shoulder against the glass, she waved with her strong right hand.

“Pegasus! Oh, Pegasus! Psst! Can you hear me? Can you hear me calling you? It’s me, Karen, your Kitten. Say something to me if you can, please!”

He did not answer her. He was as quiet and as motionless as the merry-go-round that his soul had left behind.

The Healing Horse, Ch 7, Scene 08: Karen Feels Gratitude as She Walks

Even as a child, Karen appreciated her mother’s generosity, not only with her money and her love, but with her efforts to help her grow up strong and able to care for herself.

Scene 08: Karen Feels Gratitude as She Walks

For Mama the dollar was no hardship, and Karen knew this. As she walked, she imagined how Mama managed her money like magic, and how it materialized when she needed it. Karen knew that the dollar symbolized the importance of Pegasus not only to Karen but to her mother. It showed that Mama understood how vital Pegasus was to Karen’s growth, and that she supported her daughter’s mission to rescue Pegasus.

Despite her deep sadness, she was enormously grateful for both her mother’s and for Pegasus’ love. Both were deep and indestructible. She felt the same towards them, but the question remained: What can I do about Pegasus?

The Healing Horse, Ch 7, Scene 07: Mama Silently Follows

Throughout the book, I tried to work in scenes that show how other people see little Karen, so it is not written entirely from her point of view. In this one, we get a glimpse of her mother’s commitment to her. No matter what happens, she will try to balance her child’s need to grow up into a strong woman with her little girl’s need for someone to watch over her.

Scene 07: Mama Silently Follows

Mama put down the knife she had used to cut the lox. Gathering the salmon and cream cheese, she set the still-open containers on the top shelf of the fridge, along with the bagel she had spread. The others could wait on the counter. She had to catch up with her Kitten.

What if she collapses and cracks her head open on the sidewalk? What if she faints? She will be furious if she turns around and sees me, but I just can’t let her go alone. I will stay with her, even if she walks to the pier every day.

The Healing Horse, Ch 7, Scene 06: Skipping Breakfast

This scene transitions from a night of no sleep to a day of disappointment, as little Karen prepares to return to the hippodrome to check on her beloved Pegasus, and her Mama tries to prepare her.

Scene 06: Skipping Breakfast

Mama had schmeared a bagel with cream cheese and was slicing the lox very thin, the way her Krana Layala liked it, when her girl walked into the kitchen. In spite of the cheerful pink overalls and brave smile, the pallor of her little face and the dark circles around her eyes told the story of her night.

“Morning, Mama. Thank you for thinking of my favorite breakfast, but I’m not too hungry, today. If it’s all right with you, I’ll just drink some orange juice. Maybe we can share a special breakfast, tomorrow. We can get up early, so you can still make it to work on time. Right now, I need to go to the pier and look for Pegasus. Okay?”

Oh, no! She needs a good breakfast, but I don’t want to argue with her, now. She’s so weak. I’ll go along to keep the peace. Maybe I can help her a bit so she can get a bite when she’s ready to eat. This child is going to need every bit of strength she can gather.

“Here’s some juice, sweetheart. Let me get you something to take with you, just in case you need it, later.”

Mama handed her girl a tall glass and hurried to the hallway, where she had left her purse. Returning with a dollar, she gave it to Karen who tucked the money into her lucky overalls, gulped down the juice, and kissed her goodbye.

“Thanks, Mama. See you later,” her beautiful daughter called softly, as she left through the side door and disappeared up the garden path toward the front sidewalk.

The Healing Horse, Ch 7, Scene 05: Kitten Rises to the Occasion on Sunday Morning

Determined to do everything she can to help her friend, Kitten drags herself out of bed, ignores her own pain, and decides to visit him every day.

Scene 05: Kitten Rises to the Occasion on Sunday Morning

When morning came, Karen slept late. Though the sunlight coming through the window hurt her eyes, she forced them open. She was not in the mood to get out of bed on a Sunday morning, not this Sunday. She wanted to sleep all day. She forced herself because she had to. She had to be strong to help Pegasus. He had come alive to guide her and to help her find her inner strength. She could not let him down. Even though she wanted to hide from the hurt and pain, her grieving thoughts drove her ahead.

She hobbled to her dresser and rummaged for clean clothes. Looking up, she stared at her own face. The mirror reflected how she felt. She was not her usual bouncy self. Her eyes were swollen, and she wished she had some of Mama’s makeup to hide the blemishes under the sockets. She looked like a very old tween. She had to look good for herself and be presentable to go outside. She had to take pride in the way she looked and felt about herself. She had to be there for her horse.

Who else will be there for him, if I’m not? If I’m not there, today, then when will I be?

Karen vowed to visit the demolished carousel as often as she could before its wreckage was hauled away, and before the horses were taken away or destroyed. Since it was closed, she would visit every day. She could not let Pegasus down. Her heart was breaking, and her new-found confidence badly shaken. Pegasus was Karen’s greatest hope. She did not equivocate. Within minutes, she finished getting ready.

The Healing Horse, Ch 7, Scene 04: Mama’s Vigil

Mama understands that her daughter’s grief is more than a childish over-reaction to loss. The little girl needs her horse.

Scene 04: Mama’s Vigil

Standing by the front door, Mama glanced at her watch. Her girl had slept through lunch. She picked up the phone from the desk and canceled her hairdressing appointment. It could wait for another time, for when Karen got through her crisis. She needed to be here for her Krana Layala, when her daughter needed her the most. Grocery shopping could also wait. She would ask Kimberly’s mom to pick up some noshes to tide her and her girl over.

Before returning to her daughter’s room, she picked up the phone and dialed a friend at home. This was a friend who worked at city hall. She would know what was up.

“Betsy, it’s Katie. My Karen just got home from The Pier. She loves it. It’s everything to kids her age, but she said that the hippodrome had been shut down. Something about a hotel. Can you clue me in?”

“I’m sorry, Katie, but I’m the last person you should ask about this. I’m just a secretary and a nice Jewish girl. I don’t have any authority with the city.”

“Come on, Betsy, you can level with me…”

“I could get fired, Katie, but here’s the deal…”

Minutes later, Mama hung up the phone. She knew enough. And as a paralegal, she knew what she had to do.

Lugging a folding chair from the front closet, she set it up outside Kitten’s door and waited. She felt exhausted, herself, but wanted to be available to Kitten. However, she knew how fiercely her daughter felt about being independent, and didn’t want to provoke a reaction. Every few minutes, she opened the door and put the bed covers back over Karen, who kept throwing them off as nightmares haunted her dreams. When dinner time approached, Mama made a couple of sandwiches and reheated some leftover chicken matzo ball soup that she had made the night before and kept in the fridge.

As she carried a TV tray into Kitten’s room, she hoped that the aroma of the hot soup would awaken her daughter, but Karen did not respond, even when Mama fanned the soup’s vapors into her face.

“You can get through this challenge, too, honey,” she whispered, as she backed out of the room. “Challenges, just like wealth, come in many different disguises. It’s up to you to turn this one into a victory.”

Silently, she added, I hope you can pull yourself out of this. I’d hate to see you regress. You have come so far in such a short time, especially since you started walking to the carousel. I will be here when you reach out to me.

She sat on her folding chair with the TV tray balanced on her knees, ready to bring food to her daughter, should Karen wake up. Mama knew better than to dismiss Kitten’s agony over a simple amusement park ride. The situation was about more than a child’s naive disappointment. It was about a child’s development into an adult. Her Krana Layala needed the carousel and the special horse. Mama’s mind returned to the first year of Karen’s life, and she reminisced about the month she had spent sitting by her daughter’s hospital bed twelve years before.

Looking down at the food, she told herself that she would not nibble even one bite before bed—not even a nosh. But no sooner did she promise herself that she would not eat, than did she take one bite and then another to soothe her uneasy feelings. The evening passed, and she watched helplessly as, one tiny bite at a time, she ate both sandwiches and both bowls of soup.

After setting the tray on the floor, she tried to find a comfortable position on the folding chair. The chair was more uncomfortable than the hospital chair had been after her Krana Layala had been stricken, and she was twelve years older herself. She tried to tell herself that it was okay to eat all the food, but now guilt gripped her.

When she awoke, the clock in her bedroom read four. It was Sunday morning. She peeked in at Kitten and straightened the covers. Before collapsing into her own bed, she returned the TV tray to the kitchen and the folding chair to the hall closet. The last thing she needed was to have Kitten trip and fall over one of them.

The Healing Horse, Ch 7, Scene 03: Kitten Collapses in Grief

After seeing Pegasus without his magic, a mute and inanimate carving rather than a living, speaking mentor, Karen begins a journey into darkness.

Scene 03: Kitten Collapses in Grief

After running home, Karen flopped onto her bed and buried her face in her pillow.

Why? Why? How could anyone be so cruel? How could the city council do such an awful thing?

She heard a knock on her door.

“Karen, honey, it’s Mama. Can I come in, please?”

Karen took a deep breath and sighed, “Okay.”

“What happened to you? What got you so upset?”

“They closed the carousel, Mama!”

“What do you mean, my Krana Layala? Who closed the carousel? How could this have happened?”

Kitten sniffled and could not utter another word. She lay still and tried to relax as she felt Mama’s strong hands massage her back. After a while, she felt Mama’s hands leave her back, and then the bed shifted as Mama stood. She felt Mama’s kiss on the back of her head, and the door closed.

She was alone. In spite of her grief, she appreciated her mother’s respect for her privacy. She knew Mama was trying to let her grow up, and that she was beginning to trust Mama in a new way.

She then lay for hours, debilitated by grief, crying, mind filled with images of the scattered horses on the floor, of Pegasus standing alone, mute and inanimate amid the wreckage. Her body trembled. She knew she was deeply shaken. Overcome by weakness and exhaustion, she descended into a deep sleep filled with nightmares of Pegasus and the hippodrome without their magic.

The Healing Horse, Ch 7, Scene 02: In the Destroyed Hippodrome

As chapter seven continues, Karen faces a great challenge. Having made a friend and found a spiritual mentor, she fears she may have lost him to the forces of commerce and politics. But do not fear. She will survive the crisis and go on to save him.

Scene 02: In the Destroyed Hippodrome

Ignoring the large Keep Out sign, she entered the hippodrome and scanned it in horror. The beauteous horses lay scattered on the floor, each as inanimate as the wood from which it had been carved. Only Pegasus remained upright on his pole, alone, immobile, unable to move, stationery, a statue, a three-dimensional piece of artwork, tilted forward and strapped down as he had never been before. She knew he must feel trapped, unable to whirl, to rise and fall up and down in his joyous way.

She saw someone in the calliope’s shadow and yelped, “Is that you, Joshua?”

There was no answer. Apprehensively, she moved forward until she could see the person, and it was Joshua. His arms folded over his chest, his feet spread wide, and his head down so that she could not see his face beneath the brim of his western hat, he stood in silence. She walked closer. He raised his head, his face set in a deep frown, his eyes red from crying.

“What’s wrong, Joshua? What’s happened?”

His voice cracked when he spoke. “When I come to work, this mornin’, doll, it was all like this. Looked like a blue norther blew plumb through it all. Horses all catty whompus on the floor, lights on low and nobody here. I was fixin’ ta have me a conniption fit when the boss stepped up and said he wouldn’t be needin’ me no more, since the city council was a fixin’ ta shut down the ride. I was about pole-axed when I heared that. He said I could hang around and say my good-byes to the horses, but his hands were tied and he couldn’t do nothin’ to keep the place agoin’.”

“What will happen to the horses?” Karen asked, tear drops in her eyes.

“I don’t know. I’m in the dark about that. I think they’re a fixin’ ta tear down the whole shebang and sell the stock to the highest bidder.”

Silent tears streamed down her face as she walked to Pegasus.

“They can’t take you away from me! They can’t! We need each other.”

Though Kitten held Pegasus by the mane, she felt as if they were being torn apart even as she stood there. She could not bear it.

“Pegasus has done so much for me. I won’t lose him. I won’t let him leave my life.”

She was not sure what she was going to do, but she had never been more determined to do something. Then, Kitten’s heart sank. Pegasus had not answered.

“Pegasus, answer me, please! Say something to show me that you can hear what I am saying to you. Where will I find you when you are not here? Where will I look?”

Still, Pegasus did not speak.

The Healing Horse, Ch 7: Demolished, Scene 01: Kitten Discovers Her Dream in Splinters

So far, little Kitten has overcome a lot of challenges. She has learned to walk in spite of her CP. She has developed a love of stories despite her dyslexia. She has learned to love life and to be positive, no matter what happens. In chapter seven, she meets her next spiritual test when her beloved Pegasus and the carousel he calls home face disaster.

Scene 01: Kitten Discovers Her Dream in Splinters

A few weeks passed, and the autumn leaves began to fall. The rich, vibrant terracottas of the season saturated this Saturday morning. As Karen walked to the pier, she heard the rustling leaves under her feet, but there was another sound. It was not a welcome sound. At first, she thought it was her left foot dragging on the ground. But it was not that. It was much more. It was something insidious and sinister. It was an undercurrent within the rustling of the leaves, an unusual vibration and frequency not heard by the human ear, but by her sixth sense. It was not her gait or her imagination. Something concealed lay in wait for her, and it made Kitten very uneasy, very uncomfortable, and very restless.

With each step toward the carousel, she felt herself become more unsettled and troubled. Vague premonitions of disaster rushed through her without warning, as she wondered what they meant. She hoped and prayed that everything was okay with Pegasus and the other carousel horses. She had never sensed anything so unusual, so threatening, and so bizarre. Her instinct told her that something was wrong, that something horrific had happened. She could not shake the feeling. In spite of this fear, she was determined and driven to take action. If something was wrong, then she would help. Her determination consumed her.

Hurrying past the park entrance, she noticed the dim lights and lack of action around the hippodrome. Outside, the arcade lights burned low. They did not dance with joy or flash on and off as they usually did. Looking in through the windows, she saw that the ticket booth was dark. The spotlights, which had always shone on the horses, were off. Only a minuscule night-light illuminated the room from above. Without the normally bright illumination, the room seemed gray and dead. The lively magic that animated it had been taken away.

#premonition #disaster

The Healing Horse, Ch 6, Scene 14: Pegasus Reflects

Karen and Pegasus both reflect on how he has affected her. She understands that she needs the spiritual courage that sustains him, and he understands that because of her compassionate nature, nurturing her will not be difficult.

Scene 14: Pegasus Reflects

From then on, Karen looked at Pegasus in a wholly different way. His courage and strength buoyed her, and she felt that same strength and courage within herself. Through hearing his story, she realized that she would need a lot of what he possessed as she journeyed through her own life.

Pegasus also understood that he would not be the only one who would help Karen. He knew that as she matured, new people would enter her life and shape her sweet soul. She was open and willing to become the best person she could be, so nurturing and molding her talents would not be difficult. He would help her find other people she could lean on.

#nurturing #courage