Maneuvering Through Life With a Disability

Have you ever thought about how you personally maneuver through life’s experiences? Have you ever given it much thought at all? Are you positive? Do you make things positive and have a good attitude and turn life’s negative situations or experiences around? Can you digest the experiences in your life no matter what the out come has been? Or, do certain thoughts and feelings linger in your heart and soul? Do they eat at your core, or bring you happiness? How do you deal with them?

For the last thirty years, I have been learning to exercise my muscle in maneuvering through life. I have step by step learned to use my mind, body, and soul, as a vehicle to move, in and out of life’s situations. I have learned to change position when need be. I have also learned to be dexterous while using control and skill, as I stretched and flexed my attitude as I gained positive new beliefs and strategy’s in my upward quest to my ultimate objectives.

For those of you who what to put these skills into use, I used the following:

Follow your own heart
Carve out your own destiny
Be true to yourself
Listen closely
Carefully guide yourself to achieve
Follow a plan or strategy
Focus
Be Discipline
Learn new Social Skills
Learn how to manage time wisely
Give yourself a quiet hour a day
Do your homework
Take action
Let it all merge to realization and fulfillment

In the Wee Hours

It is very early in the morning. 1 a.m. to be exact. I can’t sleep so I thought I would relax by writing some. Lots to think of and be grateful for with Thanksgiving behind me. Thinking of the recent joys and challenges I just faced. Learning to…”accept the things I cannot change… and having “the courage to change the things I can” one day at a time!

The last four days I not only had my husbands brother and wife over for the holiday’s, but I made my prune stuffing which usually comes out heavenly, which through prompting, turn out to be dry and tasteless- To having the plumbing break in my guest bathroom.

Since my hubby, Chris, could not fix it tonight, we both will have to wait till he can find the part at a plumbing store because Low’s and Home Depoit do not carry the part. Also because we must let the wet areas affected, dry out with a fan, that will run continuously for the next three days.

Thus, I will use my skill and dexterity to gain and keep my peace and harmony.

Translations For others

I would be honored if anyone out in the world wide web would take an interest in my writing and would be interested in take it a step further by translating my blog for all those to read. It would be a gift to the disabled community and all those who enjoy reading my entries. It would not only close the many gaps we face as a people with diverse background, ethnicities, and physical challenges, but it would close the crevasses in our community that need healing and filling up. Please reply if interested.

Paralympic Games

This past weekend I had a chance to watch the paralympic games for the first time in my life. It was amazing for me to watch these athletes. They moved with such grace and determination. Such dignity, confidence and respect for themselves. With and without prostheses. In wheelchair and without. All with one goal in mind, to accomplish the un-accomplishable! To prove to themselves first, and to the world second, that they could stand up before the world and shine with glory! To show the world that they were no different-

There is so much we as disable people can do. But we need the world to soften. We need the world to accept us more. we need the world to look at us the same way we look at ourselves- And, most importantly we need to be given chances and opportunities-

We need the world to not look at us with pity, disgrace, or contempt- or as though we are leopards, in a leopards colony. We need society to respect us- we need society to allow us to try and to pick ourselves up and try, try again. And, we need the gift and blessing of the world to help us climb every mountain and to help us reach every dream!

Driving With Hand Controls and Maneuvering Confidently

Back when I was in high school, I remember taking a drivers ed class. I was thrilled and nervous because I was going to be able to drive a car just like my mother, and sister, despite my Cerebral Palsy. What a sense of pleasure and excitement it gave me. Taking this huge, step forward in my life, also took my emotions on a roller coaster ride. My stomach fluttered like the wings of a butterfly, . I subconsciously knew this was an enormous, gigantic, and monumental responsibility and a big step for me; especially knowing that I had lost my lower left quadrant of peripheral vision due to my brain damage as a baby.

Although, I also knew getting my license would give me more freedom to get around the city, and to become more independent to do more of the things I’d desired to do. It would allow me to go shopping to buy pretty new clothes, or get my nails done:>))))) , or, even taken care of errands. It would be a high-schoolers dream come true! It would also allow me to soar like an eagle in the sky.

In the beginning, I was taught to drive in a simulated car. This was inside a bungalow where a big screen was set up. It was equipped with hand controls and ready for all students, such as myself, to take a seat and start driving. It was pretty cool. Its almost like the arcade driving games they have today. Anyway’s the instructors were ready for their willing participants to get behind the wheel-so they could teach them all they new about handling a car with care. Thus, the disabled students of Joseph Pomery Widney High school were immediately available to learn.

The first time I took the wheel of the car, it was amazing! I did it with little dough in my heart. I even remember the kind of car it was. It was a white, all electric power Plymouth. It had power windows, power breaks and just too cool for words. And I, Karen, Lynn Hershkowitz, got behind the wheels. I was not intimidated at all. With confidence, I adjusted the seat to my legs and comfort, adjusted my rear view mirrors and off the campus grounds I drove. The instructor told me where to go and I went.

I used my steering knob with ease. It became an extension of how freely I could control my steering wheel with one hand. It enabled me to drive down a straight streets and maneuver corners with ease- Although, I was one of the privileged few to be able to use one; as they became illegal to drivers back in the fifties. Teens back then called then knicker knobs. And they were not made as mine was. They were flimsily, and if someone got their wrist caught inside the mental part of the attachment, it could injured them badly. So only those who were legally told they could use them for assistance did.

One day I was taking a driving lesson, I was driving down Grand Avenue, going towards Angels Hill, when a buss pulled out in front of me forcing me to pull to the left and think quickly. I performed with confidence. And, I was quick, too! I had my foot on that break before the instructor could say a peep! I maneuvered that huge car like I had been driving for years. I proved to the teacher I had quick thinking. I also proved to the instructor that I could carefully move the car to the left with safety.

Making Peace with Your Past

Have you ever been awaken from a deep sleep only to have some experience or thought from the past starring you in the face? Didn’t you think you’d got rid of what ever was haunting you long time ago, or did you just berry them deep within the crevasse of your being?

Well, earlier this morning, I experienced just this- I was forced to look at myself, squarely between my eyes. I was forced to look at these areas of my life that resurfaced again. I was forced to clean house, look at my motives- if any, and finally make peace within myself.

I had to! I had to honestly look at these past experiences and finally find a way to heal- I had glimpse- glimpse that I had a choice. I could either continue to ignore them, and not find a positive resolution to what was hurting me so severely, and deeply within my core and being, or I could resolve them.

I could release these lasting impressions that creped upon my mind time and again for what ever reason they did. I could turn my life and feelings around by facing them. I could release the residue of these past feelings through acceptance. Acceptance could be my road to peace and harmony. Acceptance could be my friend if I let it-

I could let go of the worst, hold on to only the best- and determine to find hope inside my heart and mind- and I could allow it to continue throughout my life.

Reginia Hill says…”Acceptance is the heart’s best defense, love’s greatest asset, and the easiest way to keep believing in yourself and others.”

So that is what I decided!

Yes, my thoughts greeted me today- And, yes, they said …”hello, – But its what I did with those thoughts- Its how I took my feelings, and how I turned my situation around – Its how I allowed my healing process within to begin- And, its how I empowered myself to be more positive- Its how I decided to think differently- and how I decided to change for the better!

Yes, It’s not easy! Although, I’ve learned, that admitting my problems to myself is a whole lot easier and less painful than denying it to myself. It is so much easier to accept that a long time ago such and such was done and said, and, that I was not to happy or impressed with how I handled the situation at hand.

But, its how I decide to deal with it. Its how I decide to use this given opportunity to my fullest potential!… it’s how I can make and turn this particular situation around! Its how I can make it feel right within the core of my being- Its through the learning and accepting that makes me feel whole and complete again- It’s not about tearing myself down or apart for not say the right thing at the right, given moment- Its about being gentle with myself and making peace with myself through acceptance.

Well, this morning I awoke that way, and have not been able to sleep since. I woke up only to realize I had some very important business to take care of. I realized that I better do some more homework on myself- I realized that I had some very important mental and emotional housekeeping to do- I realized that I better start dissolving and liquefy the cobwebs lurking in my mind so that I could go forth in peace and harmony.

What Help’s You to Smile and Be Happy?

For the past two weeks, I have been facing many effaceable emotions. They have been as deep, and as painful as I can ever remember. However, I kept reaching out for something that would soothe my soul. Something that was positive, something that was touchable, that could and would bring me physical warmth, and a feeling of safety, and something tangible that would help me have something to recognize, release, and also would help me recharge my battery – It had to be something calming that could make me feel better, within; something that would bring peace to my heart-

It had to be something that would make me feel better quickly! Something that would ease my pain, and something that would bring me hope to remember the good things about me, my life, and what I knew was right on! It had to be like turning on a light switch- something that would immediately help me to recognize my worth, my meaning as a human being, and all that I went through was not in vain.

You see, I was very down and depressed because my thoughts and feelings were not being considered or taken into consideration by immediate family members. And this blew me away as I think of everyone- every one!

I talked with two of my dearest and closet friends, and while it helped, it did not solve or take away all the pain I was facing.

Then a week later, about two days ago, I heard a song that my dear, mama would sing to me as a child. We would sit together as the music and lyrics played. We would weep through the whole song with the truth that these lyrics spoke.

This is just one of many of my simple ingredients that continually makes me smile and feel blessed with my life!

The song was “Smile” and it was written by Charles Chaplin Jr.. In his lyric’s he says…

“smile, through your heart is aching, smile, even though its breaking, when there are clouds in the sky, you’ll get by, if you smile through your fear and sorrow, smile and maybe tomorrow, you’ll see the sun come shining through for you. Light up your face with gladness, hide every trace of sadness, although a tear may be ever so near, that’s the time you must keep on trying, smile what’s the use of crying, you’ll find that life is still worth while if you just smile…”

As I heard these words, my pain and sorrow melted. My reason, faith, and hope returned, and I was back on track being my beautiful, self once again.

Children’s Hospital

This past weekend, I went to visit my great niece in the hospital. She had a ruptured appendix, and was told to go straight to Rady’s Children’s Hospital of San Diego. So Sunday, around 11:30 in the morning, my husband and I took a two hour drive up there. The traffic was surprisingly good. We did not hit any snags in the road, or get tangled up in any bumper to bumper 15 to 30 minute traffic jams or clogged arteries.

It was the second day that I really began to walk longer distance with my sprained ankle, bare full weight on my foot, and wear tennis shoes. My tendons were stretched to the gill, but It felt good getting out of the house, giving of my own self, and, giving love to someone else who really needed the comfort and care of someone elses concern.

It made me feel wonderful inside going out of my way! It made me also feel wonderful inside that I could give of myself so freely- And, it felt even better being able to give pure unconditional support to a loved one who’s parents could not be their on this particular day.

When I walked through the sliding glass doors, I was suddenly thrown back in time. I was in a time wrap, where I could recall specific events that took place. I was a little, 18 month old child, all over again, yet it was 2008. Being in the hospital made me feel warm and safe. It made me remember my physical therapist. It made me think of how the hospital has grown; as well as gave me glimpses of my past and things to be most grateful for.

Know matter how much I tried to stay in the present moment, when ever there were silent periods of time, I couldn’t stop recalling the time I spent in the Los Angeles Children’s hospital.

Feeding Time

Every morning around 7 a.m. I am awaken by my loving furry friends. It is either Patches kissing me on the face, my sweet Siamese wanting to snuggle under the blankie’s, on mama’s chest, or my recent striped 6 month old, tabby, Cleopatra, nibbling on my hair.

What’s a mama to do when she has a bunch of hungry babies whining ? She immediately goes and feed them! So I get out of bed, get dressed, wash my face, make my bed, and head towards the kitchen. But before I reach there, I usually make a stop, to clean there messy litter box out.

While scooping out their business, I am surrounded by two kitty’s and a heeler/terrier singing to me, to hurry up! When I finally reach the kitchen, I am greeted, by a Siamese cat, Angel, who is hiding in the pantry, because she has learned to open the pantry door by herself, where her food is kept.

I pull out their big plastic containers, where I keep their healthy,organic, dry and wet food, along with their vitamins. I begin the process by trying to dish the food out to them. Some days are better than others, but on most days; I am bombarded by two kitties, who try and snatch a taste of there food before it’s ready. So patiently, one by one, I keep putting them down on the floor, only to rush to get some dry and some wet food in their separate dishes before it is eaten up in one gulp! Finally, after two or three go around’s of taking them off the counter top where they eat, I get it- All their food is plated up, and one by one I can feed them all:>)

Returning to My Untapped Roots

My readers are probably wondering what happen to the gal at Whispers of Hope who write’s those down to earth, heavy, right on, articles? Well, this girl has been busy at work in all areas of her life. I have been busy making myself healthy and whole, along with traveling and gathering information to write more amazing articles for you; as well as working towards new opportunities in public speaking.

I spent the last ten days at sea, seeing the sea of Cortez and the gulf of Mexico. In spite of falling at our last port, Puerto Vallarta, and twisting my ankle, my husband Chris and I were able to see much of Mexico and the way people live.

Despite the poverty I saw, I saw something that really touched my heart. I saw a commitment to man kind that is rarely seen in our United States today. Despite how poor these individuals are, there is still the genuine care and concern about others.

I saw it first hand with me. While crossing the cobble stone streets in Puerto Vallarta, Cars stopped abruptly to wail till I stood up safely. That probably would not of happened in our county. Even when I was a little girl of four, I was not only knocked down by a screaming stampede of five, six, seven, and eight year olds; running like cattle to win a treasure hunt, but I ended up with cuts and scrapes, a locked full length leg brace and a stretch out stepped on body and pancake hands.

I have always believed that people who are struggling understand our situation better then those who never had to struggle a day in there lives. My own experiences have reinforced that which I am learning.

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