Whispers of Hope – Karen Lynn-Chlup

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Creating Not Polishing Your Life

In our world so often our major choices seem to be selecting preordained ideas.  For some, possibilities are stars shooting in the sky, while people with Cerebral Palsy are “swayed” to sit at home and watch T.V. This comfortable coaxing is a waste of talents and people’s lives.  But an entire system exists to sustain it.  When are we going to change it?  When are we going to speak up and out?

It ought to be possible in the world we live in today, to get assistance from the organizations we reach out to.  Instead, our issues are debated. They are treated lightly and are bones of contentions.  We are (matters in question).  When will they bring forth the ease from constraint to allow us to achieve and accomplish, rather then what is comfortable for those helping us.

The system is broken because there is a definite disconnect between what is assumed “they” think we should do, and what we are actually capable of doing.  Where is people’s confidence in us?  Where is the willingness to let our ability shine forth?  Where is the bringing together and the building of bridges?  It’s easy to stand over someone with criticism, advice, authoritative power, and well meant intentions; it is far harder to figure out how to help “us” accomplish what we think is important.

Being Positive in the New Year

For those of you, who are like me, the New Year brings many opportunities and challenges.  Whether you have a disability or not life keeps moving forward.  Chances to grow, chances to expand, chances to face are always present.  It’s all in how we take life’s possibilities and turn them into sweet achievements.  Because we all know that our challenges define us.  They invite us to engage and participate.   They dare and test our ability.  And, they stimulate our response calling us to reach our fullest and highest potential.

 

Enticing Others to Believe

When I was younger, I worked over a 300 extension switchboard as a switchboard operator for a few prominent companies.  These firms were unaware of my strengths.  They were more skeptical of my ability to do the job.  They didn’t and could see I was doing more work with one hand than my immediate co-workers with two.  No one could see my strengths.  They could only see a problem to be fixed.  In their eyes, I had a deficit.  I was lacking.  It didn’t matter whether I dressed well, was faster on the keyboard with one-hand, or more organized ; my ability was discounted.

My inner- spirit has grown from this knowledge obtained.  But what is so wrong with our society that people will not promote and help those with Cerebral Palsy.  Is it the way we look?  Is it the way we conduct ourselves?  Or is it our ability to choose the direction in our own lives that people are threatened of?

Persuading in a World that Needs Convincing

Too often, we people with disabilities spend a lifetime persuading people who need convincing.  We assume the moral correctness of what we seek because we want more for our lives than what the “experts” are willing to give.  But more often than not, they degrade and stereotype those who could make it successfully in society.  This impact and emotional detachment encourages experts to look down on those who have capable achievement. The facts are there, but it is necessary to go a step further.  Otherwise, we will be couch potatoes for the rest of our lives. What is required is a journey inside the mind of those on the surface who seem uncaring and uninterested.

How to be Present in Your Life

There are many positive things a person with Cerebral Palsy and Special Needs can do for themselves.  But one must want to do it. One must be willing to step out of the box, and go to any lengths. One must be willing to take action when action is needed.

Thus, a very important aspect of your determination depends on your commitment to yourself.  Too often, people in our shoes, are not made aware of their opportunities or options because someone else has gotten in the way.  Someone wasn’t willing, or kind enough to pass the information along to you that might have helped.  The solution to this problem is to be proactive.  Triple check everything that passes your way.  Do research on information that was given to you by outsiders. Never accept a word for face value. Never allow anyone you do not know well, or trust, to pressure you into making a decision.  Listen to your inner self.  Trust what it tells you. Be gentle and go forth.

Their Word Isn’t Ours

In the mist of being a disabled person, and having Cerebral Palsy, our words seem to always be misunderstood.  The intensity of which we live, speak, and pursue our goals is shocking to the rest of the world.  They can’t handle it! It’s as though our words and thoughts have no meaning or validity.  They misinterpret our strong efforts as an obsession.  It’s very hard to grasp why everything is so important to us. But, when 20, 30, or 60 years go by and we have nothing to show for it then things become intense.  We see our life before us, and realize that all these people, places, and things were obstacles.  That our thoughts and dreams were only unrealistic hopes and plans for the future. And that our word had no meaning at all to others!

The Unfading Impact

What are the long term impacts and effects for people with Cerebral Palsy and the way we are looked down upon?  It’s been my experience, that a great deal of energy and effort has been spent in categorizing particular levels of intelligence and ability. Why is it that we as people with C.P. have to keep proving ourselves?   Why is it that as hard as we try to make something of our lives we see our opportunity’s slip away day by day through our finger tips?  Why is it that the experts continue to label us and define what we are allowed to do?  Is it because we have brain damage?

Collecting Information and our Ability

How many times have you as a special needs person sat in the team of therapist, counselors and doctor’s office waiting to be given an IQ test? Do you know what it measured?  Did it really measure how intelligent you really are?  How many times did you understand the question given by the administrator, but were unable to respond because of the way they verbally communicated it to you?  Did you realize it after the fact?  Was that the reason why you didn’t know what they were saying and didn’t respond correctly?

That is when we find out the truth about these tests!  And that is when we personally find out what we are made of.  That is when we know if we are going to fight an advance with great effort taking ricks to better ourselves, or sit back on our laurels and watch “The Wheel of Fortune.”

Words Without Meaning

How many times have you sat in a doctor’s, counselors, or therapist office, nodding your head politely because you didn’t understand what they said? Or maybe, it was because you knew exactly what they said, and what they really meant?  “Helping language” for people with Special Needs is designed to convey different meanings.  These meanings are used to limit our choices.  The word   ”realistic” sometimes is a code for settling for what is most convenient. The word “modification” doesn’t always mean getting the adjustments or adaptations you truly need, but rather being encouraged to try a fad of the moment.  We all must try to recapture the words “real” meaning. What does it “really” mean to me?  What do these words truly mean to get the assistance we need to make the most of our lives, and talents, and to thrive and flourish?

Favorable Chances vs. Missed Opportunities

When you think back on your life as a person with Cerebral Palsy and Special Needs, what comes to mind?  At first, do you personally think of all the discrimination that has come your way?  Do you think of all the misleading statement teachers, counselors, and doctors have written and documented about you?  Do you think of all the lies, to all of the attempts to which you have made your life better and to move forward with?  Can you go back in time and remember the last 15 or 20 years that have past? Can you remember missed opportunities (the tooters you never got to help you learn to read, the passing of grades not ever really knowing anything, the job you never got because your counselor would not approve your educational desires, the technical equipment you desperately needed but no one approved, the clearance and hands-up to live a healthy, “normal” life within our own limitations) how much of this is the result of all you have done?