The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 14: Kitten’s First Ride with Pegasus

During the course of their first ride, Kitten and Pegasus bond. They bring out not only the best in each other, but something supernatural, too.

Scene 14: Kitten’s First Ride with Pegasus

Three bells rang crisply, and the calliope began to play, prompting the horses out of their stillness, urging them to run in time with the graceful tempo of a sweet waltz.

“Wow, this is marvelous,” Karen said. “I’ve never been anywhere so magical,” as she whirled around and around as the music played.

The mirrors glittered, and the neon tubes on the walls flashed. Hundreds of incandescent bulbs outlined the carousel and its parts. They threw Karen’s shadow across the dimly lit, wooden floor.

In her excitement, she was inspired to ask the horse, “What’s your name?”

The horse’s face appeared frozen. His lips were parted and his teeth bared by the bit in his mouth, the painted reins wrapped around it. He floated up and down with the twisted brass pole, seemingly inanimate. Then, Karen heard him clear his throat.

“My name is Pegasus. What’s yours?” he whinnied.

The majestic horse’s silence had been broken. Even though she knew that the carousel horse was not a real horse, and that even if he were, real horses could not speak, he seemed to come alive for her. His rigid face became animated. His lips moved, and his once-rigid body became supple, his legs galloping beneath her.

Without waiting for her answer, he continued, “Is it Kitten or Karen?”

“Actually, it’s both.”

She wasn’t surprised that he knew.

“Kitten suits you very well with regard to your obviously lovely inner world. Your inner self is your subconscious; it’s quite delightful, friendly, and charming. Karen, on the other hand, suits your equally charming exterior, outer self. Karen is a name for a strong woman. It comes from Katherine, which has always been associated with purity and good character. Together, as yin and yang, they go hand in hand. Your outside personality as a human being is your alter ego. That’s the opposite of how it is for most beings, but for you, it is without question the inner world of intangibles and imagination that is the most important of all. Both of your names convey your challenges, and the purity of your heart. Although most people call you Karen, I best see the part of you that is Kitten. That name represents your sweet, honest, and demure internal light which sparkles from inside out!”

She understood exactly what Pegasus meant and cooed, “You are a very pretty horse, inside and out, too!”

In unison, they bubbled with laughter, their hearts full of gladness and mirth.

“Thank you,” he neighed.

“I’ve never ridden a horse before. This is my first time. Would you mind if I came back again at another time to ride you?”

“I’d like that very much. It will be nice getting to know you.”

“The same goes for me, Pegasus!”

She was so happy to have someone to talk with, that ironically she was at a loss for more words. Her mind drew a blank. She simply could not think of anything else to say. She wondered why Pegasus had talked, and why he had spoken to her. As a result, a moment passed in total silence, which seemed an eternity.

In order to break the silence, she asked, “Have you been with the carousel for a long time?”

“Yes,” he said with a nod. “Many people have ridden upon my back and let me carry them away from their everyday cares. They have given me great pleasure carrying them far, far, away, Kitten. Some of them have come back more than once, too! But I have a favor to ask of you. I am supposedly only a wooden horse riding up and down on the brass pole of a carousel. Please don’t tell anyone that I can talk. I can talk only with you, Kitten, but I do not want to make the other horses jealous. They are all waiting for their own special child for whom they will come alive and to whom they can speak. This is the magic of us carousel horses. Each of us was made for a child, but only for one child. Sometimes we go from merry-go-round to merry-go-round for many years without meeting that child. If you have read Gigi, then you know what I mean. The others are still waiting, but you have found me. This is the happiest day of my life, but let’s keep it our secret.”

“Yes,” Kitten replied. “This is our secret. And I have come alive for you, too.”

Pegasus seemed to burst with a glow that shone brighter than the sunlight pouring through the hippodrome windows.

The music slowed, and with it the multi-colored horses slowed their pace to a cantor, to a walk, and then to a complete stop. Kitten knew that the calliope’s sweet bidding would call to her again, another day, but not today. She knew this because she did not have money for another ticket, and her ride had ended. However, that would not stop her from coming back on another day.

#horse #pegasus

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 13: She Let the Tall Man Lead Her to the Horse

This, of course, is where the novel diverges from the memoir, where imagination takes us into the realm of the supernatural, where healing can occur on the deepest level. Kitten meets Pegasus, a carousel horse who will soon speak wisdom to her. I titled the first version of this story The Broken Hoof. This is also where that theme first appears.

Scene 13: She Let the Tall Man Lead Her to the Horse

She let the tall man lead her to the horse. The horse’s coat was shiny and polished, except for his broken hoof.

“His hoof is hurt,” Kitten said. “Can you fix it?”

“I’m afraid not now, darlin’, as we would have to call in a specialist who fixes wooden horses. Would you like to mount another steed, perhaps?”

“No,” she said as she looked at the horse’s hoof. “I want this one.”

His supernatural lavender color spoke to her heart. She intuited that he was a being of wisdom and a teacher in his essence. She felt an immediate, deep connection with him, even though no words had been spoken. She identified with the horse’s hoof because it was on the same side as her paralyzed left arm and leg. His left hoof had been split, laid open, damaged, yet it continued to function as best it could for him. Just as her paralyzed left side had been destroyed by paralysis, but yet continued as half of her body, this horse’s hoof was forever sculpted to remain in flight, bravely overcoming every challenge that came before it.

With his muscular hands, her new carousel friend gently lifted her up onto the saddle and buckled her in. She felt free as he raised her up onto the horse’s back. She was ready to ride. She was going to whirl around and around for the very first time.

With each new experience, Karen felt herself becoming more poised, more self-assured and more eloquent. Not only was she taking the biggest outward steps of her life, she was nourishing herself inwardly.

#horse #hoof

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 12: Kitten Meets Joshua and Picks Pegasus

Welcome back! I hope you had a great holiday break, and I am eager to resume posting my novel, The Healing Horse.

In this scene, Kitten and her new friend, Joshua, have their second conversation. Joshua plays an important role as a mentor, not only as an expert on horses and riding, but as someone with a deep wisdom and appreciation for life.

Scene 12: Kitten Meets Joshua and Picks Pegasus

As people got off the merry-go-round and departed from the gate to her left, the tall cowboy she had met a few minutes before ushered in new people through the gate on her right. He was still wearing his western hat, and with his bolo tie and boots looked as if he would be at home among real horses.

“Well, little lady. I had a hunch we’d be meetin’ up, again. Will you need help gittin’ yourself up onto a horse?” the man inquired kindly.

“Yes,” Kitten answered with a beaming smile. “I thought we would meet, again, too. Could you help me up?”

“Surely, I could! It would be my pleasure, darlin’! Which horse would you like to ride, today?” he asked enthusiastically.

“They’re all so beautiful that it’s hard to choose. I’d like to ride one that will help me win the gold ring, like in Gigi.”

“They sure are pulchritudinous, aren’t they? Not a plug among ‘em! But we don’t have gold rings here, little darlin’. This carousel’s not for racin’ and winnin’. It’s for bein’ in the moment and enjoyin’ the bliss of it all.”

He paused in his speech, lifted his huge hat in one hand and swept it through the air, indicating everything around them. Looking directly into her eyes, he continued.

“I know about the gold rings, but if one kid gets the gold, then the ones with the silver will all be a little disappointed, and the ones with no ring at all will be a sad bunch o’ dogies, indeed. Now, you wouldn’t want one kid to be all puffed up ’n’ gloatin’ over the others, and all the others feelin’ like a sorry bunch of losers, would you?”

Kitten reflected for a moment, silently recalling her own feelings of being a sorry loser in the school competition for grades, popularity and athletic awards. She recalled how her own strength came from accepting life as it was and from living in the moment, regardless of what happened. Her blossoming intuition understood completely what this cowboy was saying. She smiled up at him.

“I understand, completely, sir. I wouldn’t want a gold ring if it made anyone else feel bad about themselves. It’s better to enjoy the moment without turning a joy into a competition. But what does pulchritudinous mean? And what about plug? What does that word mean?”

“Pulchritudinous means beauteous. Plug is a word we use back home in Texas to mean plain and ugly.”

“Those’re brand-new words to add to my vocabulary! Thanks! I will always remember them. Pulchritudinous horses and plug I don’t know what.”

“That’s right, you do want to hang onto them words, but you’d better pick yourself a horse to hang onto right quick, now. The calliope’s fixin’ to start up! I’d hate to see you left in the dust when the ponies start to run. So let’s find your favorite mount before then. Okay, doll?”

“Okay, and would you mind keeping an eye on me, please? This is my first time riding, and I feel a bit scared.”

“Surely, I will. Since you so very modestly and unassumingly besought me, I shall keep a watchful eye upon you.”

He winked at her.

“Besought—asked?” she said. He nodded yes. “And I guess that ‘modestly’, in this case, means ‘politely.’ Is that right?”

Again, he nodded yes. Not only did her new carousel pal’s helpfulness make their friendship exceedingly special, but he also offered new and exciting vocabulary words, as well as a playful exchange of teasing, which helped her improve her mental lexicon with freedom from her usual worries. This pleased Kitten immensely.

“May I ask you how you learned these big words?”

“First, I read books. Then, I paid close, rapt, attention to what I was reading. I became fascinated with words, and I fully absorbed them. As I put these words into daily practice, I used them over and over and over again till they became second nature to me.”

Hmm. Just like me with my reading and with everything else I had to learn with my own will power.

She looked at the horses before her, and again her left arm and hand moved, pointing at one of them, selecting the most handsome one of all. He was the supernaturally lavender stallion with the magenta and blue starred saddle, accentuated by a rainbow of colors. Clearly, he was a Thoroughbred of Arabian descent. He stood out from the rest and looked the most pulchritudinous of all. His coat was shiny and polished, and he was perfect except for his broken left rear hoof. A pair of lavender, magenta, and blue starred riding boots had been carved into his saddle, as if someone had tied them there. And no one was already riding him. He was hers.

Karen was so happy that she could not stop grinning from ear to ear. Now, on top of the feeling of assuredness within herself, she felt a warm, secure flame deep within her being. It was something she had never experienced before. Her joy came from her own courage.

#kitten #words

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 11: Kitten Waits in Line

As she waits in line, Kitten experiences bliss and gets her first glimpse of Pegasus.

Scene 11: Kitten Waits in Line

Ticket in hand, Karen waited in line. The horses were far more delicious than she had imagined. Their bodies brightly painted, they pranced in circles, rising and falling, glowing with the golden light of the summer sun transmitted through the beveled windows, their refined, tapered limbs outstretched before them. Of many colors, some were the brown of deep, dark chocolate, others as black as the darkest licorice, others like vanilla ice cream, rich and creamy and golden white. For most of them, the reins matched their saddles, while for a few, the reins were of contrasting shades. Each horse was uniquely carved and painted, with a pink, blue, turquoise or magenta saddle. Their midnight blue eyes radiated such a light that they seemed to invite Kitten to come toward them, and she was drawn to those deep sapphire eyes more strongly than she had ever felt drawn to anything before.

The carousel spun again, and Kitten felt the pure essence of time. She was mesmerized by the profound aesthetics of the horses, and immersed in a moment of pure bliss. Of all the horses, one alone was a supernatural lavender, and she found her eyes following him. He was the most beautiful.

Karen felt energy and exuberance continue building within herself. I’m so proud of myself! Performing this act of bravery has proved my courageousness. I am only twelve-and-a-half years old, but this is the beginning of my life’s path.

Outwardly silent, Kitten moved forward, part of the line of those who also waited to take their favorite seats or to mount their favorite horses. Each time the carousel stopped and started, the line shortened by only a few steps. She saw that many people had bought multiple tickets, so they could take longer rides on their favorite horses, but she was in no hurry, now. Every second was an eternity of the blissful moment. She patiently relished the passing of time and smiled to herself as she caught glimpses of the mint, red, and purple balloons bumping and bouncing on long, white strings above the other children’s heads. Children were everywhere. They held cotton candy and they drank sodas. In pure loving delight, Karen watched in silence, and enjoyed their pleasure.

Thump, thump, thump! Her heart cheered. This is it! I’m going on the next ride!

Carefully, she walked toward the boarding ramp, her mind leaping back from the balloons to exactly which stunning horse she would select. At that moment, she began to feel something unlike anything she had ever felt before. Pausing, she looked around, and in that instant she became aware of a tingling feeling of the utmost importance. It was a new, indestructible belief within her being, a solid confidence in the trustworthiness of her own abilities, in the wisdom of relying upon herself more than she had ever dared. This was not a passing emotion or intellectual idea. This had the weight of certainty. It gave her the highest regard for the new strength she felt. Inwardly, she unreservedly praised herself for a job well done.

#horses #kitten

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 10: Kitten Buys a Ticket After Overcoming More Fear

Kitten keeps her perspective on her fears and on her goals. She will not let fear stand in her way.

Scene 10: Kitten Buys a Ticket After Overcoming More Fear

“Would you like a ticket?” a voice asked. “Don’t you want to go in, sweetie? Don’t you want to ride the pretty horses?”

Taking her eyes off the carousel, Karen looked around to see who was talking to her, and realized that she was standing in front of a ticket stand, poised to pay her admission to the carousel. She was another step closer to the actualization of her dream.

“What?” she answered, nervously.

“Don’t you want to go in, sweetie? Don’t you want to ride the pretty horses?”

“I’m not sure,” she said.

“You don’t know how much fun you’re missing.”

“I’m a bit scared,” Kitten explained.

“Think about it, child, and when you’re ready you can come back to see me, again, all right?” the ticket man said with a smile. “We’ll see you next time, then. The horses will be waiting for you.”

She realized that she had become filled with fear.

Yes, this is what I came here for. I’m scared, but I cannot give up now! Maybe for some people this would be no big deal, but for me this is really, really important. What’s that new word I learned? Pivotal. This moment is pivotal!

“I’m ready!” she answered. “May I have one ticket, please?”

“Sure!” he replied with a big smile.

Karen fished in her purse and brought out a bright, shiny dime and five copper pennies. Just as Mama had said, this was the price. It was posted on a sign. She stood on her tippy-toes to put the coins onto the counter and took the ticket away with her.

#ticket #fear

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 9: Kitten’s First Impression of the Carousel

As she enters the hippodrome, and without her willing it, her paralyzed left arm and hand stretch as if she were waking up from sleep. This is the beginning of her spiritual awakening.

Scene 9: Kitten’s First Impression of the Carousel

As she opened the beveled glass door, she felt a current of energy rush through her right arm and leg, surging through her fingers one at a time—thumb, pointer, middle, ring and pinky.

What was that?

The prickling sensation passed through her other side.
What is this?

Without her willing it, her left arm and hand reached out straight with fingers pointing, as if she were stretching after waking. But that arm is paralyzed, she thought.

Despite the surge, Kitten proceeded through the doors and stopped just inside the hippodrome. The faint tingling throbbed throughout her body. She sensed something spiritual take hold of her. She could not identify it, but she surrendered, setting herself free, liberating her spirit, loosening the reins of her unhealthy beliefs and fears about not coming to the carousel.

Letting go was easy as she looked at the array of colors before her. A rippling lightning bolt filled the center of the room. The powerful waltz of the calliope vibrated through the air, through the floor and through her body. She instantly took it all in with her keen six senses. Looking more carefully, she saw dancing splashes of dazzling pigment reflected on the soft vanilla walls. After a moment, the music slowed, and the rippling bolt of color in the middle of the room became a parade of whirling horses in contrasting colors. The dancing rainbow had been the merry-go-round. As it twirled, its plentiful hues merged into one enormous color palette. Beyond the lines of horses, the mighty calliope shone from the center. People dismounted from the horses and began leaving the hippodrome. Kitten moved to the side, so she would not block the door.

#hippodrome #carousel

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 8: Kitten Walks to the Hippodrome

As she overcomes her fears, little Kitten discovers a feeling of empowerment and a new perspective on her leg brace.

Scene 8: Kitten Walks to the Hippodrome

Without more hesitation, she took those last remaining steps. She found herself, a young girl with a perceptual learning disability and cerebral palsy, proudly strutting toward her goal. In a victorious rapture, she promenaded toward the red sign and the tower that held the ticket booth, with a feeling of empowered, enchanted bliss. Step by step, the cadence of her gate echoed in her mind, chiseling the rhythmic pattern of her syncopated footsteps into her memory. With each step, Kitten heard the flat, hollow reverberation of the brace buckle striking the metal bars that supported her leg. Today, that sound was but a distant annoyance. This was her dream, and she was making it come true.

As the man promised, she saw horses through the windows. She pulled open the beveled glass door with her strong right arm. Standing tall, she marched in.

#hippodrome #walks

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 7: Kitten Asks Joshua for Directions to the Horses

When Karen cannot see the horses, she asks for help. Little does she know that the man she asks will become one of her mentors.

Scene 7: Kitten Asks Joshua for Directions to the Horses

Looking around for help, she saw a tall, thin man with a blond mustache hurrying through the crowd. Dressed in a ten gallon hat and a brown plaid shirt with pearl snap buttons, his blue jeans tucked into cowboy boots, he stood out. He looked like someone who would know about horses.

“Excuse me, sir!” she said. “I’m here to ride the horses, but I can’t see them. Can you tell me where they are?”

Instantly stopping, he adjusted his bolo tie and said, “The horses are right over there, little lady, beneath the inverted funnel surmounted by a cupola. It’s the first building to your left, when you walk down the ramp, the tawny one embellished with blushing trim. You may behold the assorted members of Equus caballus through the fenestration of the hippodrome as you approach it. Each horse has a different design. Some have assorted color tones, while others have colorful tapestries draped over their saddles. Still others have stars and moons on their bridles. I’d show you the way, but I don’t think you need more help. Besides, I’m late for work and must mosey on before my boss has a conniption fit. Perhaps, I’ll see you momentarily.”

“Inverted funnel? Cupola? Fenestration? You mean the tan building with all the windows?”

“Yes, doll,” he said with a broad smile. “Simply put, they’re in through there!” He pointed a large right forefinger to a large tan building, winked, and concluded, “Appreshate ya askin’ me.”

As he hurried away, Karen saw the hippodrome to the left of the ramp, its gray roof sloping tent-like toward the sky, above a tan two-story building with corner towers. The tan looked like gold, and the red letters of the Merry-Go-Round sign stood out as if they were on fire. Inside were the horses she had come to ride. Now she knew where the calliope music was coming from. Overjoyed with enthusiasm, she was at one with everything around her. As she listened to the roaring calliope, she felt herself drawn toward its pounding one-two-three beat and the horses that she knew surrounded it. The enchanting music seemed to emanate from everywhere, slightly shrill, yet sweet and deliciously slow. It made her feel as if she were floating far away, in a world unto herself.

For a moment, she felt content to stand and enjoy the August breeze blowing through her hair, but she realized that, despite her enthusiasm, she was still afraid.

I’ll do it! I won’t be afraid to try anymore. I won’t be afraid to show myself that I can accomplish things. You can hold on, Karen. There is no reason why you can’t do this. It won’t be that difficult!

#horses #fear

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scene 6: Karen Arrives at the Pier

When Karen arrives at the Pier, she enjoys the sights and sounds, and the crowd. She feels free.

Scene 6: Karen Arrives at the Pier

Karen paused under the Santa Monica Pier sign so that she could become fully aware of her surroundings. She glanced nervously at the crowd, hoping to see a friendly face to encourage her, but there was no one she knew. Better yet, there was no one to discourage her. She realized that she was truly alone and on her own.

In spite of these mixed feelings, she did not want to leave. Her yearning to ride the horses lured her on. She heard the thunderous, thundering calliope crank out heavy waltzes, and knew she must be near the carousel. She saw children hurrying past in enthusiasm and excitement and found herself soaking up their gaiety, happiness and endless energy. Their laughter and high spirits lifted her own.

She looked down the long, concrete ramp at the vista of amusements. Chocolate brown concession stands sold figurines, cotton candy, ice cream, and hot dogs. The Ferris wheel revolved above everything else. Directly below it, stood a shop that offered big stuffed animals as game prizes. Scents of root beer, hot dogs, and pretzels permeated the air. She wanted to have the same kind of carefree fun as the other children. She sighed.

Yum, smells good. What a fantastic place to be on a summer’s day. Maybe I’ll meet a playmate today. I wish I had someone to play with, so I wouldn’t have to do this alone, but even if I don’t, I’m going to have fun, just like all the other children I see here! Today, I won’t let anything stop me!

She felt fully oriented to her surroundings and smiled with pride and satisfaction. Even though she was surrounded by people, she didn’t feel crowded. She felt free. Ignoring the flashing neon lights and mouth-watering scents, she brought her focus back to her goal and realized that she didn’t see any horses.

#courage #pier

The Healing Horse, Ch 5, Scenes 4 & 5: Karen Writes a Note and Walks to the Pier

As the summer passed, Karen realized that the time was right for her walk to the Pier. It was now, or it could be never.

Scene 4
One splendid afternoon, late in the month of August, she sat at her mother’s desk and wrote her Mama a note, telling her what she was about to do. Karen’s legs were ready, and her spirit was strong. She was not going to risk a last-minute veto. Too much was at stake. Soon, school would start, and Mama would get home before her, and be home all day on the weekends. Walking to the pier without giving Mama the chance to stop her would become impossible. Mama had told her to walk to the pier. She would, and now was the time and the perfect opportunity.

Holding the paper down with her left hand, she flipped it over and folded it in half. “Mama” she wrote on the top, before she left it neatly centered on the hallway table, where Mama would see it when she dropped her purse, there, after kicking off her shoes.

Scene 5
Merrily, with the slowness of her gate, she trudged the seven blocks to the pier, where she immediately looked for the horses.

#disabilities #courage