One Friday night back in 1982, I wrote this poem. My friend Robert and I had decided to take a walk from the West Hollywood apartment I shared with Mama up the hill to Tower Records on Sunset Boulevard. It was our favorite hang out place. 

“Let’s go,” I said in a merry voice as I put on my shoes, tied them, and headed out the front door into a lovely summer night with the temperature just right and a little breeze. The full moon lighting our way could not have been more beautiful.  

We climbed the big hill, breathing deeply, catching our breath, then with four more blocks to go, we saw the two Tower Records buildings. We had made it all the way. Since we didn’t want contemporary or pop that night, we went to the one with classical music. Smiling, enjoying the moment, we walked the final distance and through the door into a room filled with vinyl records and cassette tapes to browse. 

We stayed for well over an hour, then relished a walk down the block, taking in the beautiful gardens surrounding the homes we passed. Three quarters of the way down the street, I saw a snail sitting still and taking in the moon, just as we were.

My friend Robert said, “Why don’t you write a haiku about this?” 

I said, “All right.”  

And it was. 

Moon’s Glow

Bare silver branches
Alone under the moon’s glow
I see a snail…

You can order my poetry collection, including this poem, here: Reflections of My Heart.

Original text ©2024 by Karen Lynn-Chlup. All rights reserved. Image by Mike Dillon (assumed based on copyright claims). CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons,

On my fiftieth birthday, in 2001, I was thinking about my family tree, my roots, and the history of my life, not just ethnic, but cultural too—strong, grounded, growing from kindness, love, dignity, and strength of character.

I realized how strong my foundation was, and how it made me face every challenge with an inner light to brighten the hearts and souls of others. Not only had I bared my soul, I had uncovered it. I had discovered it.

If I can do this, you can too.

Little Seedling

How young you are, my little tree,
You’re a seedling amongst all that be!

And even though your branches are weak,
You grow stronger with every breath you seek!

Do you know why
You are the most beautiful
Of them all?

It’s because you sway
With every beckoning call
Listening sensitively
All on your own!

Your wonder,
Your glory,
Your beauty,
All come from the powers you posses!

They are your gifts!
My sweet girl!
For you have stood tall,
Taking each disappointment,
Without complete defeat

You stand in quiet solitude
With dignity and grace!

This poem came to me one day, back in 2004, when I was feeling pretty down low. It had to do with the man I loved.

That day my heart hurt because of the way he talked down to me and at me. Because he hurt me so deeply, my feelings were out of control. I could barely speak, I was so upset.

So, I reached out to my friend Shawn, who lived in Massachusetts, and we talked by telephone for a long time, but within a few minutes of describing what was going on inside myself, I began releasing my anguish, letting go, and feeling better.

As I relinquished my grip enough to free myself from the stress and tension, I knew I had to release my anger, and when I did, that anger and hurt turned to forgiveness.

Yet, as my friend and I talked, I knew I had to hang up, so I could write, affirm, meditate and forgive not just my beloved—but myself for reacting. I needed to be alone and allow myself to breathe and set my heart free.

And I did set it free, but unfortunately, Shawn also eventually withdrew from my life. He was a good friend. I miss him and wish him well.

LISTENING

Today was dark!
My heart felt like sinking.
My thoughts drifted far from reality.
My voice quivered and disappeared!

Then I dialed you
And listened to your sweet voice.

You spoke words that sounded like a symphony,
And started a crimson blaze
Within myself,
Out of control!

You were so right,
And I was totally
Left on my own!

Original text ©2024 by Karen Lynn-Chlup. All rights reserved. Image by J. M. W. Turner, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.

Once again, I tried to help a friend of mine who had been in my life for twenty years.

Back in 2003, we were the best of friends, always there for each other with a comforting hug that gave both of us respite from a demanding world.

Yet, once again, he drifted away for another year and a half, and once again, I had to let him go with love as I prayed, affirmed, and wished the best for him. And that he would be all right.

I would always be there for him if he ever came back into my life needing a friend. Hence, this poem from 2003.

LIKE MORNING DEW

Your friendship,
My friend,
Is like
The softness of
Morning dew

Your friendship
Is like the gentle waves
Ebbing out to sea,
As the sun’s amber rays
Shine down upon me

Giving me pure
Nourishment from above,
Wisdom from within,
And enlighten to carry on!

Oh, how can I say
Thank you, my friend,
When words are not enough,

Please hear me
With your heart,
And see me with the sight
Of your soul,
And always, always
Walk beside me,
Singing tunes
Of your favorite
Inner song!

This poem was written in 2002.

In the quiet, still light, I watch the sun melt to dusk. This is one of my favorite moments of the day. It’s serene. There’s little or no noise. I am all alone, and there is an absence of movement and sound. All I can see is the physical result of earth’s changing location and position relative to the sun. My spirt transitions with the light. Now, the only movement I feel is my heart talking to the stars.

You can order my poetry collection, including this poem, here: Reflections of My Heart.

Many times, within myself, I grappled about my feelings around what happened to me; not just being paralyzed by a faulty vaccine, but learning unconditional love and acceptance of myself. Characterized by my presence and passions for the qualities of being a positive person, someone who turns negatives into positives in my life, and everyone’s lives, I changed.

In 1992, I wrote this poem after realizing how I had evolved, and how a transformation of my being, a dramatic shift and realization, had changed my being. I didn’t want to be looked down upon, or thought of as a broken human, ever again. I wanted an everlasting change in my life, and I had grown, and I had caused myself to grow. This epiphany was revolutionary.

Knowing this about myself, I turned toward acceptance and unconditional love. Unconditional love became my purpose. My disabilities became my greatest teachers in life. They helped me cross bridges, make friends, and take on difficulties and misfortunes, so I could become a voice and a light for everyone who came into my orbit.

LIFE SENTENCE

What a tragedy to have
Lived imprisoned for so long!

To feel,
But not really be able to feel!

To talk,
But never really being able to communicate what is wrong!

To touch,
But never really being touched with life’s inspirations!

And why?
I don’t know why life
Has taken this course
For me!

Maybe because of my own suffering!
I have tried to make my life a happy one!

Instead of bearing fruits of the vine,
I bear bridges with miles
And miles of ocean water between lands!

These bars I once wore on my left leg,
They are the clattering chains,
That are there with my every step!

And my arm, it is the wing that has been clipped
Dangling like a pendulum to and fro.

Imprisoned with a life sentence which
I never had control over!
Only to look deep within
Searching and finding
An unconditional acceptance
For myself
Which I never knew I had!

One night, back in 1992, a nightmare rocketed me out of a deep sleep. I awoke sweating and trembling in terror, shaken to my core.

Wrapped in only a thin, black nightgown, I had stood, burning in agony within a blaze, the flames leaping all around me. And I had nowhere to run.

Awake, I knew I had to face this dark part of my soul, the part that was trying to heal from the negative feelings that came with facing my life situation. Part of me wanted to bury all the hurt, pain, negativity, and darkness, but suppressing it would never work. Inwardly, I would burn to death if I tried.

There was fire all around me.

I asked myself, what did I do to create this within my being? Why did I feel bad about speaking up for myself? Was there something wrong with me for daring to be brave and advocate for myself?

Or was the source of my self-doubt outside of me, in the lack of understanding and inability to see and hear me and my truth, on the part of the so-called experts, who discounted me and made me feel less than others, who dismissed me as a human being trying to better myself, my situation, and to fit into this world?

While alone and defenseless, in this dismal emptiness, I rose to my feet as a new me. The fight to live the life I wanted as an educated professional, my war with the California State Department of Rehabilitation, helped me become the person I am today. My subconscious self emerged from the nightmare with a fresh voice and strength.

The poem below symbolizes how facing my darkest moments changed my character and my life. I did it in the face of adversity and by myself. If I can do it, you can do it, too. And, of course, I will be here for you.

LEAVES OF STILLNESS

The night
Knocked at my window
Haunting me
With a black shroud and
Carrying my body to that
Cold, barren tree
Which covered me
With bronze, burnt
Leaves of stillness

Oh
I cried!

Time tip-toed by,
Leaving me
Lonely and defenseless
Only to see myself
Through my own
Desolate attitude!