I have heard a lot of commentary about kids bullying others, and then those same children who could not handle the making fun of any longer; killing themselves or hurting someone. Many people do not know how much that actually happens in the disabled community. But it does. Sometimes its even worse than out in the “regular world.” I know this because I lived through it, and experienced it a number of times first hand.
When I was a child the kids around me would chastise me for having an over-weight parent. Time and again, they would say mean and cruel words that stung deeply; of which all I could do was swallow what they just said, and turn the other cheek. Still another time, I was directly bullied by the classmate’s in my classroom. I was a quiet, demure, good-hearted child, who never thought twice about saying something or doing something down right nasty just for the sake or fun of it.
Yet, I had classmate’s that did just that! I experienced a practical awareness of people who came up to my personhood, stared me in the face, spouted nasty, sweet, nothings to me directly, grab my work assignments right from under my very nose, and ripped then to shreds. Still another time, as an adult mind you; while teaching a young client who had C.P., I was directly ostracize because she felt she had a right to mock my movements. Obviously, someone put this in her mind. Where did she get this from. Was it her wealthy background, her being the eldest child, or her controlling, manipulative ways. Was she made fun of by others, herself? Or, did she believe that making fun would get her somewhere?
What she did not realize was she was also making fun of herself. With a stern, caring, compassionate, human side, I professionally sat her down; and reminded her that she too had a disability, and while it was the same, yet different, she would not like it if someone made fun of her. People are not aware of how much there words can impact people around them. It would be very useful if we all took the time to think before we hurt someone’s feeling. If we perhaps, really took the time to be careful there would be a whole lot less suffering and tragedy.
Love it girl ! so many of the human race arent humble enough! and need some time on the otherside to realize we r all the same just a bit different in ability
I whole heartedly agree…It is time to grow up for many people whatever their age…I know all of us can stop and think before we speak and make the next words we say really count in a good, rather than destructive, way.
Well said, Karen. The children’s verse,
“Stick and stones will break my bones,
Names will never hurt me”
is so not true. Cruel words can hurt long after bruises fade. Humans can prevent this hurt from occurring by considering the words they say.
Karen — for many bullies — and this doesn’t mean I am giving any of them an excuse for their foul behavior — but for many bullies — there is someting pathological leading them to hurt, denigrate, harm, coerce, and physically assault others. They need treatment — sometimes for anger management — they need
our prayer — and they need to be walked away from — and we all need to teach each
generation what the phrase “sticks and stones may break my bones — but words can
never hurt me.” However we need to add a word “your words can never hurt me. In
the end — evil must be fought by any means
necessary — without returning the hurt or
meaness. Keep writing. Keep perging.
Karen, your words ring oh, so true! Bullying at any age is reprehensible, and I believe that talking about it–especially with our youth–is an essential part of the solution! Keep up the great work!